saying "bye" to 2013 & a memory jar!

At the end of the year, I always feel like "thank God 20__ is over!"  I'm not sure why...looking back on it, I can't pick out one year that was the worst year ever...but if often feels that way.  Maybe I am just always bummed that the holidays are over and that I have to go back to school...

Anyway, I wanted to TRY and remember a few wonderful things that happened in 2013!

- I was able to stop working part-time and focus on school!
- I was shown a ridiculous amount of love at all pre-wedding festivities (i.e., my shower & bachelorette party)
- I watched as my older brother graduated!
- WE GOT MARRIED! :)
- I watched one of the best friends I have ever had marry her perfect guy!
- I became an aunt for the second time to a precious baby girl!
- We went to Punta Cana for 10 days!

Overall, it was a year filled with A LOT of love, laughter, and happiness, and I am so grateful for all the blessings we received!  I know I forgot a lot, though, so for 2014, Dan and I will be keeping track of our blessings!

Yesterday, I made a "blessings" / memories jar.  I painted a mason jar and added some stickers and ribbon!

cut up paper so that we can easily write down our blessings!

I was pretty happy with how it turned out for it being a quick craft with supplies I already had!  Beginning tomorrow, we will write down good things that happen, things that make us happy, and any other blessings that come our way.  At the end of 2014, we will be able to remember all of the wonderful things that happened, and maybe we won't be cursing the previous year for no reason at all ;)

Christmas Recap!

I hope you all had a FABULOUS holiday!  I always enjoy being back in Normal and getting the chance to catch up with many of the people that I love.  We headed back up north last Friday and stayed until the next Saturday!  It was our longest trip home in awhile!

While there, I was able to see the lovely Sara and her beautiful daughter, Cecelia!  We didn't take any pictures...very unlike us.  Guess that means that I need to go home again soon to cuddle that sweet girl some more!

I was also able to catch up with some beautiful friends from high school.  My friend, Jordan, joined the Navy earlier this year, so I was ecstatic to learn she would be back in town for the holidays!  It is always lovely to catch up with people that I don't get the chance to see very often!

The rest of my time was spent with family!  Every Christmas Eve we all go to my grandpa's and then to midnight mass.

Christmas morning was spent at my parents' house, opening gifts and playing with my brother's girlfriend's adorable little boy!  We then went to lunch at Dan's mom's house, and we finished the day with dinner at his dad's!  It was a BUSY day, but it was full of laughter, and I have to admit, I got some good stuff!  (clothes, a new GPS, a curl secrete!  (that actually works!  I was shocked!), necklaces, bracelets, scarves, etc).

Our final celebration was on Friday with my immediate family.  Parents, my brothers, and all significant others/children.  It was a fun time!  Brenna Bug was so excited to see/open the gifts.  Yes, I know she is only 5.5 months, but seriously, if you could have seen her eyes widen!  She would then proceed to shove the gift to her mouth ;) but she also ripped the paper with her hands.  Aunt Trisha was super impressed ;)

funny faces with Ms Aidan!

Our precious Brenna Bug!

Can you tell that I love these girls a bit?

All of us!

I hope your celebrations were filled with as much love and laughter as mine were!

that time I was supposed to get my master's

I don't know if I have mentioned it ;) but I am currently a full-time graduate student.  I am in a dual degree program to become a school psychologist.  This semester, I completed my requirements for my Master's of Science in Clinical Child and School Psychology.  After classes this spring and summer, and a year of working full-time as an intern, I will complete the requirements for my Specialist in School Psychology (SSP).

With the dual degree program, there are two opportunities to walk at graduation.  One was last weekend, for the MS.  The next chance is at the end of internship year, which will be in May 2015.  I figured after a year of internship, I would have no desire to walk.  Internship year won't feel like school, with the exception of finishing up my thesis.  I will be working in a school, doing what I will be doing after I graduate for good.  So I wanted to walk this month.  I wanted my family there.  I wanted the pictures.  Graduate degrees are not common in my family.  In fact, besides my grandmother who earned a master's, I'm not sure anyone has a graduate degree.  Even though I am not all the way done, I wanted to celebrate reaching this milestone.

Then the snow came.

And it wasn't a TON.  But the roads were bad enough that my brothers couldn't drive the 2+ hrs at 5am on Sat morning to make it.  After looking at the road conditions, I decided I probably shouldn't even drive the typical 30 min to campus for graduation.  When idot says that 270 is "snow or ice covered" at 6:30am, I know that means people are sliding off the road or in the ditch.  I guess with most of my family not being there anyway, it felt pointless to risk it.  

I put on the gown and hood for a few pictures, anyway...because, damn it, I earned that hood!

Not walking doesn't take away the accomplishment, but it was a huge bummer to miss out on the experience.  Guess this lady will be coming back after working for a year to walk for my SSP.  I NEED the family pictures with me holding the little folder thing.  Fingers crossed there isn't snow to ruin my day in May 2015!

Christmas Crafts!

It's Christmas break, y'all!  I am SO relieved to have a month off of school, and I have some big plans to do a whole lotta NOTHING!  I will catch you up on the end of the semester...and the disappointment of what was supposed to be a graduation today, but for now, I thought I would share a few Christmas crafts that I have done recently :)

First up - Personalized Ornaments!

I made these for the nieces and nephew.  I wanted to get them all a personalized ornament because it is such a fun keepsake, but then I saw this on pinterest and thought it would mean even more if I made them!  All you need are some clear plastic ornaments, letter stickers, red and green spray paint, and glitter spray paint.

Put the stickers on the ornament, then spray paint it the base color.  When that dries, do another coat with the glitter paint.  After that all dries (I actually waited a couple days), peel the stickers off, and ta-da!  Personalized ornaments :)

Next, I made a reversible block decor.  Please excuse my lack of step-by-step pictures.  Apparently I don't have the crafting blog, picture-taking stuff down yet.

I started with a 2x4 that I had Dan cut down into 7 pieces.  2 were about 4.5 in, 2 were about 5.5 in, and 2 were about 7in.  The last piece was just cut to be long enough for the 2 smaller squares to sit on.  Then, I stained the blocks so that they had a finished look on the edges that wouldn't be covered with the decorations.  After the stain dried, I cut pieces of scrapbook paper a smidgen (that's a pretty precise measurement) smaller than each block, and modge podged them on.  Specifically, I did a layer of MP, stuck the scrapbook paper on, did another layer of MP, and after that dried, did a final layer of MP.  That covered the Thanksgiving side of things!  Then I flipped the blocks over and followed the same steps for the Christmas side! 

I also put one layer of MP on the sides of each block so that they had the same glossy finish.  Things started to come together here!  I bought some letters from Michaels to hot glue on to each side, as well as some stickers for the smaller block.  (The stickers needed another layer of MP...apparently they didn't really feel like sticking to dry MP.)

I was so excited with how it turned out!  I didn't get to display the Thanksgiving side this year, but the Christmas side makes me smile each time I see it on my mantel! 

Has anyone else been feeling crafty?  Find any quick, easy, and cute crafts on pinterest?

Christmas Traditions!

Christmas is my FAVORITE!  I have a feeling I am not the only one.  ;)  My wonderful memories from my childhood probably give me this warm and cozy feeling that I have whenever I think of Christmas.

Here are a few of the things I remember happening EVERY year, when I was a kid!

- our cousin came and stayed with us after Thanksgiving to help decorate our house for Christmas

- decorating sugar cookies with my grandma the week before -- this is probably my favorite!  Her kitchen would be FULL of countless types of cookies, and my brothers and I spread sugar cookies out all over the table to decorate with every color sprinkle you can think of.  We lost my grandmother over 11 years ago.  For the past few years, I have taken on the sugar cookie challenge solo.  It's not nearly as fun, but it does make my heart happy to remember those special moments with her!

- spending Christmas Eve at my grandparents' house -- opening 2 gifts!  one from whichever cousin chose my name for the gift exchange, and one from my grandparents

- going to church with the whole family

- driving back to Normal, having a competition to see which sibling saw the most decorated houses on their side of the car ;)

- waking up at roughly 4am and ALWAYS convincing Josh (the  youngest) that it was HIS turn to wake up mom and dad.  They always acted mad, but years later, we discovered they would be awake laughing at us arguing about who should wake them!  (one year, we used the dogs paw to scratch at their door to wake them up! -- we were SO excited!)

- getting lottery tickets in our stockings!

- spending the entire day in our pjs watching movies

Now that none of us live at home, 2 of us are married, and my brothers both have kids, Christmas has changed a lot.  It is fun making "new" traditions.  I can barely wait for Dan and I to have little ones to begin some Cleinmark Family traditions :)

tornado relief

On Sunday, devastating tornadoes went through central IL.  

Central IL is my home, and though all disasters break my heart, this one has been especially difficult.  Thankfully, my hometown was spared.  Normal experienced a lot of wind damage (e.g., trees and electrical poles down), but that is nothing compared to the devastation in Washington and Pekin.  

When we moved back from AL (where I was born), we lived in Peoria, IL.  My first memories are from there.  My grandfather, great aunt, and other extended family still live in the Peoria/Pekin/Washington area.  I know a teacher that works for the high school in Washington.

Maybe that's why this is tugging at my heart so much.  Maybe it's strange that hearing about this hurts my heart more than hearing about the tornadoes in Joplin and OK.  Maybe it's normal.  I don't know.

All I know is, I felt compelled to do SOMETHING.

So I bought a shirt - from hopefully a reliable place that will actually get the money to the Peoria Red Cross, like they claimed.
So I donated a monetary gift through my university.  I LOVE that they are taking collections to donate directly to the Peoria United Way.
So I will be donating cat and dog food to the drive at school because my heart is BREAKING for the animals.  Dan says my priorities are messed up, but I don't think so.  I can't imagine losing everything in a tornado, but losing my irreplaceable dog would make the whole ordeal 100xs worse.
So I will be donating some school supplies to my home parish, as they are collecting for a catholic school in Washington.

It isn't much.  But it's what I can do to try and help.  I encourage you all to see what you can do.

Prayers for the precious Brenna Bug!

If you are unaware, being an aunt is my favorite role that I have had in life.  It is such a blessing!  I have two beautiful nieces.  Aidan will be 7 in December, and Brenna is 4 months old!  They are absolute joys.

Aidan can talk my ear off, which I LOVE.  There is nothing in this world better than a big Aidan smile, hearing her say "Aunt Trisha!" and getting a huge hug from her.  Her and I have a special bond, I think, and I hope that we can continue to stay close as she gets older.  I pray that she always sees me as someone she can depend on and confide in.  I love that girl more than words!

Brenna, or Bug as her daddy has got us all to call her, is SO MUCH LIKE her big sister.  She is one of the sweetest, happiest babies I have ever known.  Cuddles with that girl make everything else that sucks in the world just disappear.  Even though I never want her to get any bigger than she is now, I can't wait to see her personality come out even more.  It will be so fun to watch her learn all about life and to see what she has in common with Aidan and what is dramatically different.

my favorite girls!

Bug at 2 months old!

with her moo cow from Aunt Moo!

I tell you this because that sweet, 4 month old, baby has been in the hospital for 18 hours hooked up to an IV!  She has been vomiting excessively, unable to keep any milk down, and is severely dehydrated.  So far, nothing has been determined as a cause, and though I am sure it is just a stomach bug, "just a stomach bug" is so bad for a little baby!  Currently, it seems all they can do is continue to pump her with fluids, even though I am sure the baby needs some nutrients/fuel to fight off whatever is making her sick.

I am not concerned that she won't make a full recovery quickly, but I do ask that you keep her, my brother, SIL, and precious Aidan in your thoughts and prayers, as I am sure this is scary for all of them.

motivation! (or lack thereof)

I am falling off the motivation wagon, people.  Barely hanging on at all!

I just don't care about what I am eating right now.  At all.  Since the beginning of Oct, it has been a huge struggle.  Then 2 weeks ago, I went a week and a half without working out.  Even Dan was all "I am pretty sure this is the longest you have gone without working out since January."  Called. Me. Out.  And with the exception of our honeymoon, homeboy is right.

I feel worse when I don't work out.  I am grouchy.  I am tired.  Blah blah blah.  People say that it takes ~21 days to develop a habit.  For over 10 months I have worked out 4-6 days a week, and it is NOT a habit yet.  What the heck?!  There have only been a handful of times that I really WANTED to work out.  I can't understand why this is still such a struggle for me.

The other day, I stepped on the scale.  The number is starting to creep back up.  SHOCKING!  (just kidding, obviously).  My 4'10 frame shows every one of those added pounds, too.

Hopefully I can find some motivation soon.  Maybe when the Halloween candy is finally gone, things will start to move in the right direction.  In the meantime, if anyone has any spare motivation, I will take it!

chugging right along

Well, it has been a hot minute since I took some time to talk about life on here.  I have been just a smidgen busy.  School is crazy (which is what I always say...because it SO is!)  I am just trying to get through each day and make it to Thanksgiving.  After Thanksgiving, it will be 2 short weeks until Christmas break, and I will be able to remember all the things I enjoy about life.... ;)  Over that break, I will be graduating!  Which is pretty crazy.  I won't be done, yet, but you better believe I am going to rock that MS hood and pretend that I am done forever for about a month.  And I am going to LOVE it!

Since I am such a negative nancy, here are a few things that have made me smile over the past few weeks!

a wonderful visit from a wonderful friend!
It involved a winery, a haunted house, and lots of laughter!

a birthday dinner with my family!
It involved snuggles from an adorable almost 4 month old,
hugs from my favorite 6 year old, and lots of laughter

a new light fixture in our entry way!
I have hated that paper towel-looking light since we viewed the house!
2.5 years later (I think...) I convinced Dan that this fixture that was on sale
is GOOD ENOUGH and SO MUCH BETTER!  I win.

my Jeep entered semi-retirement.
we had our problems, but home girl struggled through nearly 50k in
less than 3 years.  she never left me stranded, so I appreciate that.
she will be sticking around for snowy days and dirty jobs ;)

but most of my time will be spent in this new-to-me Equinox!
PEOPLE.  I have NEVER driven a car this nice/upgraded.
I am feeling so incredibly blessed/spoiled, and loving every minute of it

So there's that.  Life isn't all bad.  Only school is bad.  It's just unfortunate that it takes up so much of my life.  I am in the home stretch, though, and the end goal is worth it!  In the mean time, I need to look for these little things that can bring me more smiles :)

A Quarter of a Century

Yesterday, I turned 25.  I won't bitch go into too much detail about how I spent my entire birthday grading the 1st years' assessment administrations.  But I did.  And it was one of the lamest birthdays to date.  

BUT!  As I was looking through pictures to post, I realized that even though yesterday was lame, I had a pretty good weekend ...

Went to The Post to watch the Cards beat LA

Headed to the Casino...where I made $3.52 off Dan's $20.
So really I made $23.52.  Boom.

For my birthday Dan made me pancakes!
And got me flowers.
And a card with a cow.

My family spoiled me.

I got lovely texts all day :)

I convinced Dan that I NEEDED a cookie dough blizzard
for having such a sad birthday. ;)

We ended the day cuddling with this cute dog.

And this morning I got myself a venti from sbux.
Because when you get a free birthday drink, you take advantage.

 I'm not sure, yet, how I feel about 25.  Ten years ago, I expected life to be pretty different than it is now.  ... I think.  I guess I don't really remember being 15...haha.

I think I am OK where I am, though.  It feels weird realizing I'm closer to 30 than 20, but life keeps getting better.  Before 30, I will be DONE with school, getting a big girl job, and starting a family, and I am ready for that stage.  ...

Just have to struggle through 25 the rest of grad school ;)

home?

I moved to St. Louis in August of 2007, when I began undergrad at SLU.  The summer after my freshmen year was spent back in BloNo, but with the exception of those 2.5 months, I have been a St. Louisian for 6 years.  Since I moved here, there have been MANY things that I have quickly fallen in love with.  How can you NOT love a city that has so much to do?  If you're bored here, it's because you aren't trying.  The zoo is FREE.  During the summer, there are FREE concerns at the Botanical Gardens on Wednesday nights.  The city museum is a blast.  There is pretty much always some sort of concert/show going on.  Forest Park is a gorgeous place to spend a day, and it's common for some sort of event to be going on here.  Food Truck Friday was my newest love this summer in Tower Grove Park.

BUT!  There is also a lot that I hate.  Driving here gives me the most ridiculous anxiety.  Besides the fact that MO doesn't make kids take drivers ed, which still makes absolutely NO sense to me, the lanes throughout much of the city are freaking SKINNY!  Like, my jeep just fits, skinny.  I also don't love how everything is spread out.  I am used to everything being 10 minutes from my house, but that's just not how things are here.  Dan and I both have to commute about 30 min in opposite directions every day.  If we lived in BloNo, that would not be the case.

Most importantly, I really dislike being 3 hours from my family.  After we graduated, I wanted to move back home.  I wanted to raise kids in the same town as their grandparents.  Mostly for the free babysitting, but also because I have wonderful memories of weekly visits with my mom's parents.  The Mr. was a rockstar, though, and got a wonderful job while he was STILL in college that has transformed into the perfect job for him now that he is done.  He would not be happy giving that up and working for "the Farm" at home.  

On Fridays, I have to drive through/around downtown to get to the city my practicum placement is in.  Sometimes it still amazes me that this is my home.  First of all, I can't believe that I can actually drive on 70 without hyperventilating.  That was my biggest fear when I got here, and even though I get stressed, I manage ;)  But mostly driving by the arch and seeing Lumiere and the stadium, etc....  It's nice.  Dare I say that today, it felt like home?

It may have taken 6 years, but I can feel my roots digging in here.  I feel like I may be OK with raising a family here.  I think I may be falling even more in love with the city that took me from home, and I am OK with that.

Right now, I'm grateful I took a big chance and moved to STL without a single person I knew.  But I am extra grateful that Dan chose SIUe and that we have both found our place in this city :)

workouts as of late

I have been struggling in the motivation department, lately.  And the food department.  So I haven't weighed myself in 2 weeks (I typically weight myself once a week).  I don't see a reason, currently, to confirm what I know.  If I keep at it, I will be packing on some holiday weight before any holidays start!

Tracking my workouts has continued to help me, though.  I put a workout "task" on my google calendar for each day at the beginning of the month, and my current goal is to work out 4 days a week.  Because really, what excuse do I have?  From Jan-May, I worked out 5-6 days a week, so I can handle 4, dangit!  For me, checking off each workout feels good, and I like looking at the week and month view to see how successful I have been.

This week (10/6-10/12), I worked out 5 days!

Sunday - treadmill intervals and some dumbbell work
Monday - the sworkit app (it's my lazy workout...but it's a workout!)
Tuesday - off
Wednesday - treadmill
Thursday - bootcamp!  Which I have been LOVING!
Friday - off
Saturday - treadmill intervals to 2.25 miles and some dumbbell work

I also got a head start on this week and did some sprints on the treadmill today before working arms on the total gym and finishing with some squats.

I am not too interested in switching up my food right now.  So many things sound WAY too wonderful, so if I want them, I am pretty much giving in.  Hopefully I am burning enough calories to at least stay pretty stable and not pack on the weight before Christmas.  I am currently about 15 lbs lighter than I was in last year's Christmas pictures, so I would like to keep it that way!

stress city.

It is NOT a good day when you are in tears three times before noon.

School. Sucks.

And that's about all I have to say about that.

Who am I kidding?

I also have a headache.  Probably a little from crying...and I also think I am having some serious sinus pressure.

Also. Also. Dan brought home candy from his dad and stepmom.  Thank God.  That chocolate is helping.

As did the margarita I had with lunch.

Gotta do what you gotta do.

Just cross your fingers, please, that at some point BEFORE Christmas (because I really don't think I am going to make it that long before a legit nervous breakdown) school stops being so ridiculously crazy.  I just need things to actually start falling into place for my required practicum projects.

And now I need some headache medicine.

solo weekend

Oh man, guys, I had THE BEST WEEKEND EVER.  OK...not really.  It was actually pretty lame, but I am going to tell you about it anyway!

Dan went out of town Thursday night and took our puppies.  He will be back sometime today, but it was so weird not having my dogs to keep me company!  Oh, and not having my husband home.... ;)

I spent 75% of said weekend grading WPPSI administrations, which are IQ tests that are given to kids between the ages of 2 and 7.  The children were so adorable and had the most hilarious responses.  Seriously, if I could get hired by a district to do their early childhood assessments for children they are concerned about, I would jump on that job in a heartbeat.  I LOVE listening to little kids tell me the things they know.  They are so proud and so accomplished when they look at that picture and know it's a guitar.  It's the little things ;)

Cleaning also took place this weekend.  A lot of cleaning.  I hate cleaning.  Our guest bedroom was still FULL of wedding stuff, though, and we have guests coming for the next 3 weekends, so I HAD to de-clutter.  A lot of stuff was thrown away, the closet was organized, and the vacuum was ran on the poor floor that hadn't seen the light of day in probably almost a year.  It looks great now, though!  You can actually walk in it, and guests will have floor space to throw their suitcases!  Win.

I also got the living/dining/kitchen area all picked up.  It's amazing what a woman can do when the husband isn't here to make it all messy 5 minutes later!

I also put wedding pictures in all of our new frames.  There are still frames to be bought, but I am caught up.  Now to build more walls so that we actually have somewhere to hang them all...

Sunday, after having successfully talked myself OUT of working out the past 2 days, I hit the pavement treadmill.  I really need to get back to running a few days a week because my current schedule of kickboxing, bootcamp, and running only once or twice is making me hate my runs even more.  2 miles feels like death.  So yesterday I did some intervals, changing between 3.2, 5.6, and 6.  I spent most of my time on 6, so no judging ;)  But getting to 3 miles with even a few minutes of 3.2 walking was HARD.  And I am sore today.  Oh dear.

Finally!  I went grocery shopping.  Alone.  Which I also hate ;) so that I could make chili for my hubby to come home to.  And I talked myself into ingredients for a few other meals this week because I should probably go back to cooking and not eating mac n cheese and frozen pizzas (like I did all weekend...oops).

Anyway.  That's enough rambling.  Check out my pictures from the weekend that SCREAM Fall! :)

Fall/Halloween decorations and chili!
My house was oozing Fall last night!

First really Fall outfit!
I plan to wear variations of this over the next few weeks!

5 on Friday

I have never tried this before, but I figured, why the heck not!  Attempting to "link up" for 5 on Friday!  (We'll see if it actually links to anything)

1 -
I spent roughly 25 hours of my week / weekend grading the administration of standardized IQ tests that the first years in my graduate program are learning.  Repeating that this week.  Then next.  Then the next.  And so on until the middle of November.  Totally going to try not to tell y'all about it EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. but you know, it's a lot, and it keeps slipping out!

2 - 
Dan headed back to BloNo this weekend to dog-sit his dad's dogs, so he took ours.  Our puppies LOVE his dad's yard and playing with the other dogs, but I couldn't sleep well last night.  I need my cuddle buddies!  My house is so eerily quiet right now.  I could never live along, it's decided.  Dan is stuck with me forever.

3 - 
I am SO excited about the rest of this month.  Some of my favorite people are coming to visit for fun Fall activities!  I am thinking some fires, pumpkin martinis, haunted houses, and more!  LOVE LOVE LOVE!

4 - 
Totally just came home from "work" (I use quotes b/c I am a practicum student, so they don't pay me...but I do SOME of the stuff a grown up school psych does) and took ~ a 2 hr nape.  Guess I am in denial about that 25+ hours of grading waiting for me ;)

5 - 
I BOUGHT SOME PUMPKIN SPICE COFFEE CREAMER!  I will tell you all about it next time.  Fingers crossed it is everything I have been searching for because I couldn't handle any disappointment right now!

happy October!

I may have mentioned that Fall if my favorite season ;)  but in reality, it is OCTOBER that I love!  It is by far my favorite month of the year...and I will tell you why!

1. It's my birth-month!  Who doesn't love a month day ALL ABOUT THEM?!
2. The weather!  Typically it is perfect!  I LOVE LOVE LOVE wearing jeans, hoodies, but still being able to rock my flip flops!
3. The leaves!  They finally start to change colors.
4. Walking on crinkly leaves!
5. Bonfires
6. Haunted houses!  Dan and I will be going  to three this year, and I can't wait!
7. Being able to wear boots and scarves!
8. The start of legitimately NEEDING hot coffee in the morning.
9. Fires in the fire place.
10. Decorating for Halloween.
11. Giving out candy!  I really can't wait for this!  I have had work or school the last two Halloweens  so I am so excited to actually hand out candy to the kiddos in our neighborhood.
12. Going to the pumpkin patch!
13. Drinking Eckert's Apple Cider
14. Hay-rack rides
15. Corn mazes

As the month progresses, I am sure I will remember more :)

October just makes me SO happy!  Hopefully it lasts forever b/c November will bring WAY too cold weather!

baby fever.

I have 15 pages to add to my research paper and another 5 page assignment for another class.

So naturally I decided to write a blog post instead.

I have a serious case of baby fever.  Dan and I got married 4 months ago tomorrow, and I know for a lot of people this would be "too soon."  But Dan and I have lived together for over 2 years now.  We were together 8.5 years before we tied the knot.

So if I wasn't in school, I would be so ready!  I think Dan would be, too.  If we both had jobs, we would definitely be financially stable enough to support a little one, and for me, that is a priority.

I know that we have to wait.  And we are.  There is no way I could give a child all that he/she needs with my school obligations.  I feel bad enough that I am neglecting my husband, animals, and friends.  Clearly there isn't time for a child that would require so much more than I already give of myself.

Knowing those facts doesn't make it any easier, though.

I see pictures of my sweet nieces, friends' babies, and pregnant bellies, and I get a little jealous.  I know that I will have my turn, and I know that in the long run, this is what is best, but it's still hard.

Next month, I will be 25.  That is by no means old, but it still feels old!  Maybe that is part of this.  A "crisis."  ;)  

All I know is, I have to GET OVER IT!  Otherwise, the next 2 years will be ridiculously long!  I just need more baby fixes of other peoples' kids...  :)

Happy Fall Y'all!

It's Monday again.  I am not really sure how that keeps happening so quickly, but alas, here we are!

I had a FABULOUS weekend, though, so that helps!  We left Friday afternoon to head back to BloNo for the weekend.  Friday night, I surprised my friend at dinner.  For the past 5 months, she has been through boot camp and A school for the Navy.  Before heading to San Diego to begin her orders, she came back home.  It was great to see her in uniform and so happy.  I am so proud of the decisions she has made for herself and the success she is having!

Saturday Dan and I heading to our friends' house for Kel's birthday.  Dan and the guys went paint balling, while I hung out with Sara, some of her family, and adorable Cecelia.  Cecelia came up to me multiple times and held up her hands for me to pick her up and cuddle.  It made my heart so happy!  I also always enjoy catching up with Sara.  We never run out of things to talk about ;)

Saturday evening, we had Avanti's at my parents' house.  I can never get enough Avanti's when we go home.  Best. Bread. Ever. !!!  We also had a fire, which I can never complain about.  It was nice to just relax with the hubby, my daddy, and Joshy (my baby brother!)

Sunday was a fun day, too!  We went shooting!  Josh has 4 guns, so we spent quite a bit of time out on a family friend's property.  It was wonderful to spend that quality time with my brother!

Later in the day, I went to catch up more thoroughly with my navy girl friend!  There is something about starbucks and old friends that makes me feel so content!  We had dinner with Dan's mom and nana before driving back to the STL.

As soon as we got home, I put on pjs and was asleep before Dan even had the dogs inside.  I am an old lady.

a week in the life.

As a full-time graduate student, I get a lot of inquisitive stares/questioning looks when I say something about being busy.  I get it.  Many of my friends did not work in undergrad, so they can look back on those years and remember how amazing it is to only HAVE to do something for a few hours a day.  Maybe 2 or 3 classes, then they would spend some time in the library.  Then hangout.  Don't get me wrong, I worked throughout undergrad ... for awhile, I worked 2 jobs while taking a full caseload, and even I look back on that time and think about how nice the free time was ;)

Then I took a year and a half off and worked full time.  I did not miss school all that much.  I LOVED coming home and vegging out without HAVING to read something or HAVING to write a paper.  I am remembering it fondly and wondering why I have put myself in my current hell.  haha.  (Then I remember that though I enjoyed my job most days, it wasn't nearly what I wanted to spend the rest of my life doing...)

So here I am.  A full-time graduate student in school psychology.  What is that?  Well, it's a changing field, but I can give you a quick snip-it.  Overall, we help to identify children that cannot access the curriculum due to different disabilities, and we help to create accommodations so that they can be successful in school.

I can tell you first hand that going to school for this is NOT a walk in the park.  I am BUSY, people!  Here is a glimpse of how I spend a typical week.

Monday - I work in our clinic office from 9-4.  This is my assistantship.  It provides me with free tuition, and I get a small monthly stipend.  Because of this, I do not have a "real job" outside of school...  But it is a job that takes up a good chunk of my time.  I stick around campus until our kickboxing class at 6pm!

Tuesday - We have class from 9:30-12:20.  This class requires an insane amount of reading (books, empirical articles, etc), as well as a large project outside of class that involves identifying a student with behavioral problems and working with their teacher and parents to develop a plan to reduce problem behaviors and increase more desirable behaviors.  This project will involve at least 4 meetings, data collection, intervention implementation, etc.  It's a wonderful learning opportunity, but it's a lot.  Typically I can get home pretty quickly after class and do an early afternoon run :)

Wednesday - Clinic from 9-4 -- this is usually a rest day for me.

Thursday - Class from 9:30-12:20.  This is my psychotherapy class.  We are learning multiple therapy theories, and our large project includes doing therapy with a child at practicum for at least 12 sessions throughout this semester.  I am getting started on that Friday.  Anxiety provoking, to say the least!  I then work in our clinic until 4.  Occasionally we will go to a workout class on Thursdays, or I go home and do circuits.

Friday - Practicum (where I am placed at a school doing assessments, attending meetings, completing those projects that I mentioned) from 8:30-3:30. -- this is another rest day, typically

So those are the times I am REQUIRED to be somewhere.  On top of those times, I am working endlessly on my MS research project and reading A LOT for class.

Beginning next week, my schedule will get more insane, as part of my assistantship involves grading the cognitive assessments that the first years are learning to give.  I will watch all 10 students' tapes of their administration, and it will roughly take 30 hours/week for the next 10 weeks.

I see a lot less sleep in my future ;)  Which is sad for Dan because I am a grumpy bear without 7-9hrs!

But really - I should say.  I am incredibly fortunate to be in school right now.  I complain about it endlessly, but I am learning how to do my dream job.  Who doesn't want to work a typical school schedule?!  Summers off?!  SIGN ME UP! 

monday blues.

Mondays are unnecessarily hard.  I don't even sleep in (usually) on the weekends, so getting up shouldn't be more difficult...but it is.  It is cruel.  I was extra excited about my coffee this morning, that's for sure.

In related news.  I should have made warm coffee this morning.  brrr!  I have been obsessed with my iced coffee kcups, but something warm would have been better on this wonderfully Fall morning!

Overall, I had a pretty great weekend!  Friday night, we had a girls night - dinner and drinks, followed by doing some crafting.  My friend is getting married in June, and for her centerpieces, she is wrapping wine/beer bottles in yarn.  It sounds easier than it is, I promise.  Or, I am just not crafty at all...and that is a possibility.  Either way, it was a great night to just relax and enjoy each others' company!  I can never complain about that.

Saturday I spent the entire day reading for class.  I even stayed up late (1am) to finish reading so that I didn't have to worry about it at all on Sunday.  When I finished, I realized that I read one of the wrong chapters.  I had the privilege of reading the correct chapter Sunday, so that was very exciting...

Dan spent his Saturday building me a "cube storage" deal for the closet.  Target didn't have any 4-cube storage things in the store, and their website wanted to charge me over $30 to ship one.  Um.  Nothankyou.  So Mr. Handyman said "I can build one of those, no problem!"  I have to admit, I was pretty surprised at how well it actually came together, painted an all!  He even added an extra shelf to the top for some shoes.  I need more clothes storage, so as soon as my fabric drawers (that will fit perfectly!) come in, I am going to do some major organizing, and I am stoked!

Sunday we went to the Cardinals game!  It was ACS day at the ballpark, so it seemed like a great reason to go!  We were able to walk on the field - well the dirt...I attempted to walk on the grass, made it about 3 steps and was promptly yelled at.  Still pretty cool!  

on the field!

It was a great game, and I don't even like baseball.  I guess sports are typically better in person, but I feel like this may have been my favorite Cardinals experience.  We had pretty great seats, we saw a few home runs.  The cards did a great job of hitting doubles/singles to bring runners in.  It was a lot of fun!

We ended the evening with football (oh. btw.  all of my teams won this weekend!  Bama, Notre Dame (yep, I know it's weird I cheer for both...last year's championship was hard), AND the Raiders).  After football, we watched the latest Breaking Bad episode.  I hate Walt.

Happy Monday.  Hope you enjoy your last week of summer!  The calendar will agree that fall is here next week!  Woo hoo!

my run

Quick-ish funny story before I tell you all about my run last night.

My lovely husband of 3.5 months does not like wearing his wedding ring because "it is going to get all scratched up!"  Me telling him that it doesn't matter, and in 50 years it should look worn, has yet to change his mind.  He takes it off as soon as he gets home from work.  When it is time for us to leave, either for a weekend home, the store, dinner, whatever, I just stand there and stare at him until he goes "oh shoot!" and runs to the bathroom to get his ring.  Homeboy wanted one of the more expensive choices.  He better freaking wear it!

Well, Monday morning I saw it sitting in our bathroom after he left for work, so I hid it.  Maybe the fear of "losing it" would make him realize it should stay on his hand!  He didn't say anything to me about it Monday night, but yesterday morning he tried to casually bring it up, but I could tell he was nervous when he said "um...any chance you have seen my wedding ring?"  I just smiled, and he knew that I had.  He had apparently been looking all over in places he could have left it.  I brought it to him, and he put it on, and when I got home last night, it was still on!  Hopefully this is progress ;)

Monday night I had kickboxing, and I was still feeling it a tad bit last night, so I thought I would go downstairs and run a mile on the treadmill.  As soon as I got on the thing, though, I realized a mile is kind of lame when I KNOW I can go further, so I decided to do some intervals.  I walked 2 min, which always gets me up to .1 miles, and that's how I typically warm up.  Then I turned it up to 5.0 for a min, then 6.0 for 2 min, 7.0 for a min, 6.0 for 2 min, 5.0 for a min, and 3.5 for a min....then back up to 5.0 to repeat.  I went through this 4 times.

The first round, my calves were cramping up.  I thought about stopping because they felt so tight, but when I got to my 3.5 walk, they felt slightly better, so I went on to my second round.  My calves were still tight, and then I got a side cramp.  So far it was a pretty lame run.  Third round my calves felt OK, but I still had the side cramp and then another cramp right under my left lung.  Originally I was going to stop there, but I thought I could make myself go 4 rounds, so I did.  Besides the fact that I was completely out of breath, my body stopped hurting on round 4!

I made it a total of 3 miles, and by my calculation, I probably only walked about .3 miles of that.  I have definitely  never run 2.7 miles before, so it is a little bit of progress!  I am still working toward my goal of being able to run a 5k, so hopefully that will happen eventually!  With cooler weather coming, I am going to attempt to run outside more, which is going to be a lot harder for me, but I think the payoff will be better!